S4F: Much Ado About Nothing This Month
By David Siegel Bernstein, PhD
Sorry for the brevity (and by brevity, I mean lack of substance) of this month’s S4F. This past month I’ve been battling a lot of projects. Fear not, I’ve been mostly victorious. Here’s a little bit of fun to tide you over until the next S4F — where I will throw you back into the deep end of science and show you how to float for the sake of fiction.
Here are a few jokes (I didn’t create them, so don’t shoot the messenger). If you have any you’d like to share then by all means send them to me!
Why did the chicken cross the Mobius strip?
To get to the same side.
I went to the Mobius strip club. The show never ended. (contributed by Marty Goldstein via my facebook page)
Two atoms bump into each other. One says “I think I lost an electron!” The other asks, “Are you sure?” to which the first replies, “I’m positive.”
Two science fiction writers walk into a bar, which is kinda funny because you would have thought the second one would have seen it.
Rene Descartes went into his favorite bar and the bar tender asked, “would you like your usual drink, Monsieur Descartes?” Descartes replied “I think not” and promptly disappeared. (S4F comment: okay, this wasn’t a science or fiction joke, but it’s still funny)
Two chemists are sitting at a restaurant.
The waiter asks what they want to drink
Chemist 1: I’d like some H2O
Chemist 2: I’d like some H2O too!
The waiter brings them their drinks.
Chemist 1 drinks his H2O happily -
Chemist 2 dies! (taken from a Brains Matter posting)
Q: What’s red and smells like blue paint?
A: Red paint
If Schrodinger’s cat had been radioactive, he’d have had 18 half-lives.
S4F comment: although the next bit is meant to be funny, it really is an easy way to remember the laws of thermodynamics. My comments are in brackets.
The Laws of Thermodynamics:
1. You can’t win. The best you can do is breakeven (first law deals with conservation)
2. You can’t breakeven (this is entropy)
3. You can’t get out of the gate (this is because you can’t reach abs. zero)
See you in time and space… and S4F
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Authors: David Siegel Bernstein. Form: Column. Length: 500 words. Editor who accepted this story: Previous Editors.
Author Bio
Abandoned Towers Content: S4F: Black Holes (Don’t Really) Suck S4F: Black Holes Suck S4F: Can Anyone Intelligent Communicate with Me? Other Than My Earthling Friends. Part II S4F: Can Anyone Intelligent Communicate with Me? Other Than My Earthling Friends. S4F: Do You Know the Time? S4F: Do You Know the Time? Part II S4F: Do You Know the Time? Part III S4F: Fiction by the Numbers S4F: From Higgs to Holograms S4F: I Have Virtually Nothing to Say About Zero-Point Energy S4F: If You are Uncertain—Call a Quantum Mechanic for a Fix S4F: Infinity for Fun S4F: Infinity of Fun, Part II S4F: Invisibility, Science not Magic S4F: Meet David Siegel Bernstein – Forensic Statistician S4F: More or Less Human S4F: Much Ado About Nothing This Month S4F: Now Playing at the Opera—The Faster than Light Particle Experiment S4F: Paradox Found S4F: Paradox Lost S4F: Parallel Worlds S4F: Splicing Science from Fiction S4F: The End of Infinity (Infinity of Fun Part III) S4F: We Hold Universal Truths to Be Not Self-Evident S4F: What’s the Matter with Antimatter?
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March 8th, 2012 at 6:43 pm
Interesting article!
Stealth is easier than cloaking, and we already have the technology.
March 30th, 2012 at 7:41 am
William you are absolutely correct. Invisibility (a descendant of Stealth) is not only easier to achieve, but a future topic. I thought I’d go over invisibility first to please those who enjoy Harry Potter, but want to write hard science fiction.
April 5th, 2012 at 5:39 am
Fascinating post. We are so much empty space and mostly water. Amazing to think how we can be beings of intelligence and creativity.